My Marriage Advice stolen from Annie Lamott: Bird by Bird

Today Scott and I are celebrating our 16th wedding anniversary. I feel like I should write something profound and meaningful about being married for 16 years and having two sets of twins and a surprise. (Yes, it was a surprise because a certain husband was quite sure that we were too old to get pregnant and, like a teenager in the backseat of a steamed-up car, I listened to him.) But we are here at 16 years. Annie Lamott tells this story in her wonderful book on writing and life, Bird … [Read more...]

When it is too quiet. . .and I’m getting too much done. . .

So I was making dinner this evening, thinking to myself, This is great! Homework done and the four boys are outside playing baseball. Wow! What a long way from a few years ago where making dinner meant holding one while the other climbed up my leg and two more raided the pantry for Cheerios. I had that LOOK AT ME ROCK THIS DINNER THING moment. YEAH, I'VE GOT THIS DOWN. . .Let ME tell you how it is done. . . As a matter of fact my friend, Amie, a mother of three year old twins, asked me … [Read more...]

Did you WANT to have Twins?

Since my first pregnancy was a twin pregnancy, I don't think I thought about wanting or not wanting to have twins. Scott and I struggled to have children and had to resort to in vitro to begin our family. We were so excited to become parents and we thought that the two-for-one deal was a great way to do it. But after a "not-as-I-planned" emergency c-section and babies hooked up to tubes and monitors and the unrelenting demands of caring for such fragile lives, I desparately struggled during … [Read more...]

What to Bring to the Hospital

    I was 32 weeks with my first set of twins when I met my cousin, Ellen, for lunch. I remember her asking me, “Do you have your hospital bag together?” “What? I’m only 32 weeks. I have at least six more weeks to go.” “You need to get that ready now!” she said with urgency in her voice. Of course I didn’t. I was still trying to finish the nursery and get other things in order. The next week my husband rushed me to the hospital when I had excruciating back pain. … [Read more...]

10 Things to Remember When your Babies are in the NICU

  Seeing our newborn babies in the NICU was probably one of the hardest things I've ever endured. I had spent months planning this perfect delivery; envisioned taking my two darlings home; and, continuing on our happy little way. So, when I delivered my twins at 33 weeks, my dream of "how-it-was-going-to-be" turned into a confusing, and with the magnesium drip I was on, almost surreal experience. Looking back now, I wish I had had someone to guide me through my first foray into … [Read more...]

I Don’t Really Enjoy Babies. . .or this is Harder than I ever Imagined

  I am the oldest of five children. I have four younger brothers. I was a teacher. I have been around babies and children my entire life.  Imagine my shock when I discovered after my twins were born that I wasn’t enjoying the infancy stage. The guilt. . .the angst. . .the fear that I made truly the worse mistake of my life and there was no turning back. Not that I didn’t love my babies but caring for them in those early, sleep-deprived, intensive days, I struggled mightily. I … [Read more...]